The Perfect Concept Of A Date In Tatters

*An old one I wrote when I was 17 that I just came across*

Can you remember the times of yore
Walking down the empty dull lit steets
Locked together by a statment
Knowing were it was we were going
Their was no alternative to this lone routes
Nothing could in our wildest dreams could go wrong

But now the streets are clatered with people
The likes i’ve never witnessed before
Pouring in from taverns like the flood
Serving no purpose but to get in our way
But maybe i speak to soon on our behalf
As your lock on me is loosening ever so slowly

He wiskes you away in obscured visionary
All it ever takes is shelter and the deals done
You can’t take what you promised him now
But to take it from me is all to easy
Their is no lock, their is no streets, their are no people
Just walking aimlessly untill i find it agian

14/02/2014

At first, as if too marionette your actions, I feigned indifference at the offer
For a 30 quid overdraft in the name of smearing the dye of my jacket
Against the half price circa 1990 bargain bin wallpaper
All to the soundtrack of to a chart of the charts
All to the flavour of a 6 pack of lukewarm ale
I could’ve died and fallen to the bridge bar underworld

Until you stole my gaze, the second I caught your reflection in the fridge
The bar I could never reach, A ruby amongst the garnet
I knew I couldn’t live with myself, until I’ve exchanged language with you
A beer pong spectator, A greatest movie debater, A sexy story dictator
Whatever role you wish to play, it’s fine by me, as long as it keeps you talking to me
And I can keep seeing that intoxicating smile

As time treacles down the drain, along with the Rosé wine
Our cheeks have gone the way of the rouge stains on the carpet
As I bare a witness to the Aurora Borealis of the night
It’s when your eyes start to illuminate the room when you begin to divulge your passions
The way you describe the stage, it’s as if it’s a piece of Asgard on your little blue rock
Each description of how each cog turns the machine, gets me excited with you
I’d like to think I’m not so shallow as to lose my breath at the flex of intellect
But I can’t deny the saliva pushes against the palate, when these words leave your lips

You try and deter me with cautionary statistics, and ask to refocus my beer goggles
You sink your head into you chest as you lament about your vessel to me
I have to chuckle to myself, that you’d think such a thing would turn me away
As I engage in the one of my excruciation mental battles with my occipital lobe
You see it’s taking him a while to believe the mortal avatar of Aphrodite
Is still talking to me when she has a catalogue of Adonises to pick and mix from

You say I could do better, but baby don’t you understand
I’ve tasted the greatest soma, and it’s just apple squash
I’ve tangled with the most complex nous, and it’s just channel surfing
All in comparison to you, golden trophies turn into copper coins
I know I don’t deserve to clean the dirt between your toes
But if you feel generous, maybe I could loan a kiss or two from you
When our calves are in-between the shoes, pressed up against the front door
Seconds feel like days, when I’m so close to them mocha corneas

Each inch of your construction deserves my full attention
I could spend a millennium caressing each and every pour of your body with my lips
Timing each and every kiss, with the precision of a diamond cutter as I travel up your legs
Slither my way through your chest and leave my insignia on your neck, before returning to your lips
Oh darling I know I’m being greedy but if the outside is this outstanding
I struggle to comprehend what awaits me inside the grey matter
Let me sync with you my empress, let your inspiration and creativity pour into me
Just a second of exposure to that mind of yours, will lighten my entire life

Oh even if you choose to desert my shores this time tomorrow
And shoot for the stars you were clearly born to grasp in your hands
I’ll spend a lifetime in ecstasy, no matter how grey the skies will get
Just a second of nostalgia with my valentine, the silver will beam through the clouds
But if you ever decided that this lowly peon could be your man
I’d transcend to a state of a mind, that unfortunate mortals could never reach

Dedicated to B.B

The Valentine No Show (W.I.P)

My eyes they dry like a Sunday morning washing line
My lungs press together with a vice of your presence
I’m struggling to stay alive, just walking to your door
The body’s willing but their’s no air
I’m gasping on the floor it’s to much to bare!
The grip on my fingertips is starting to weaken
The choke on my glands is getting righter
The blood in my hands is getting thinner

But the thrill of young lovers can be deceiving indeed
We met both strategically clad in our battle armour
Ready to wage war like a DVD cover of a 80’s road flick
And yet we act like business men, handing out contact details
To arrange a transaction which we feel could benefit our brands
While you tend to your needs, I’ll play happy couples

I think it’s easy to claim you’d lay in wait on my sofa
On the frost bitten evenings, to stroke my scalp
To unplug the scalelectrix whirling around in my brain
When i’m tracing the stairway to heaven on your navel
And sending your eyes away to the back of your skull
If I held it all for ransom, would you still come back to help me?

I’ll allways be your best man, the one your ashamed to admit
That you think about when your future homeowner misses the mark
But you can never be anymore then a charity case to me girl
As I sit starting at the walls on the hill of the roller-coaster
Where will you be when I howl into the night asking for your love?
Would you be anywhere if I couldn’t offer a surge in return?
Would you be somewhere else when someone can do it better?
I know you wouldn’t my sweet, and I know that’s your right

Looks like I won’t be seeing around this St. Valentines
I know I wouldn’t, and I know that’s your bloody right

I Can’t Stop You From Appearing In My Dreams

It’s 3:52pm and it’s now I hear
That the broadcasts from down under reach their peak
Even I admit that’s a weak excuse
But anything to put off crawling to them sheets
Anything to stave off meeting you again
In the one place you van still Influence me
Smack in the middle of smoky storybook aspirations

Westbound to a plain of intangible letters and sentences
Only in this sector of the concious
Where desires are interpreted for temporary manias
Do you stand before me again

All grudges flow out through our pours like black tar
The hate seeps through the husk in our breaths
The spite flakes off our very skin
All I have left to remember is to how to stay betrothed to you
I was no one else’s to lose but yours my love

Utilizing my muscle memory you lock your fingers with mine
Like claws on a tow truck you whisk me away
We take a quick hike from the town centre to yours
With the parts I can’t recall replaced with golden plated bridges
Connecting my recollections together

The ingrates that poisoned you have been purged
Their mouths stitched shut to stop them from bringing you down
It’s just you and I with the audience of the washing up
There isn’t a thing to fret about
Just how the sunlight highlights your genius design

The smoke flows from the floor boards
I smear it through the threads of your scalp
You inhale it through your regulated pants
As it pours from the ducts into your irises

Trace the curves of optimum natural selection
Grasp the wrist of a submitted romantic intention
Groove to the rhythm of a calculated routine
Play it back those glossy sweet sugarcane memories

The Clock hits 9 and caresses my eyelids
The reality kicks in and the mist starts to disappear
I beg my master to release her grip from my limbs
But her grip stays aggressive just like an anchor

She sinks her claws, digging deep into my wounds
She tugs from within my arms to keep me pressed against her chest
I can’t stand the guilt, the oh so familiar sting
How naive of me, for it was me who brung you here in the first place

An interpretation that’s all you are
A reflection of the reality, with a sweeter taste
And smoothed out edges
A version of you that doesn’t berate my birth wronging
While you demand I clean the wounds on your arms
As you leave the ones under my legs wide open

The hate floods back into my veins
As if to cue the pins and needles
It flows to my profile and forces my eyes open
For another cycle I’m free from your grip
Until my eyes grow heavy and then I’m yours again

I sigh entranced by the husk of cheap larger
Clawed onto the wood of the desk
Never has the fate of my psyche rest so delicately
On the fringe of a single number

Oh who knows what lies behind
The other side of reactionary protocols
Did you answer my pleas?

Or did you leave the screen on
While you open another bag of caramel popcorn?
Did you grit your teeth
As you reluctantly offer an arm?
Did your eyes start to moisten
As you demand to know of my lack of heart?

The entire globe can be undone, just after a click of the button
I’ll pull back my chair and make another brew downstairs
“After this one I’ll find out, though I said that 47 brews ago
But I swear I mean it this time!”

As I pour brew number 53
Into the mug you got me for my birthday
I slowly drag my heels up the stairs
And into your line of sight once again

I don’t deserve to have even gotten your attention
I don’t pray for much, but please god…

No Dream Gal (W.I.P)

While you relive and recite the terrible accounts of today’s shift
The same accounts everyone else present has been through too
But somehow they seem to keep it under wraps, funny that
The joints in my fingers are starting to ache and stiffen
As I reach the end leg of this 1,000 curl hair twirl marathon
With dandruff unapologeticly gathering on the shoulders
I start to gaze out of condensed glass and begin to wander
How i’d be spending my time if the slots had stopped in my favour

We’ll first trade glances at the new years due
I see your mugshot pop up on my computer screen
I must be grasping at straws for a mutual interest
If I’m claiming we have a shared passion for The Fall

But if that’s what it takes to get me talking to you
About which blockbuster you’d like to see next week
I can fake it easily, just for you my darling
I throw a date, a time, an offer round about your way

If only people flowed so naturally together, or maybe they do
And maybe it’s a joy a niche existence like mine will never know
I start to zone in and hear how your manager unfair-
Okay time to zone out again, now what would happen next

You’ll pop round mine uninvited, banking I’d still be in the clutches of my sheets
In your arms you’ll clutch a box of hors d’oeuvres, ripped from a dying relatives 97th
With a flavour of confidence in your vocals, you let it slip we’re bathing in the sun today
We’ll be tasting the finest processes, protruding from the coldest machines

With a tinkle injected into my sockets, I rush upstairs to get ready
But suddenly I’m stopped in my tracks, by a choke-hold on my collar
Gasping for an explanation she curves around my form and explains it to me clearly:
“not without getting your imprint on my navel first”. Oh yes how I’d kill for that

If only people flowed so naturally together, or maybe they do
And maybe it’s a joy a niche existence like mine will never know
I start to zone in and hear how the new iOS is on the fritz
Oh great…

I still believe it can happen one day
And the diamond of my eye is laying about now
Writing about how she dreams of her ideal lad
In the middle of mundane coffee dates in the spring time

Panic In The Evening

I feel like a hoodlum standing outside a memorial
With cans of neon lit paint in my backpack
Complimented by a small armies worth of explosives
Ready to set hell on a beloved artefact with my insignia
All to quell my impulsive decisions

Yeah, that’s how I feel right now
When your perched upon my mattress in the afternoon
With the slits in my curtains raining on your skin
Showing just how perfect your design really is
Each curve tailor made to my exact specifications
Each imperfection made to compliment your excellency
Laying my grubby fingers upon you now
Would be the worst fucking crime I could conceive
Like rubbing grease all over a Mozart sheet

I just wanna die
If it means I can cower out of this mess
Run for the hills before I poison you anymore
Your flying with angels on pale light nights
And I’m greasing the gears behind the scenes
Please just pull the trigger and leave for good

As I continue to deface your form even more
You permit my ascension to the sacred place
The fumes starts to slowly creep inside of me
I start to hear the taste of each bead of sweat
As it tunnels into the folds of my mind
I can’t feel the guilt I should be
I can’t feel anything anymore
You don’t deserve this, not even for a second
I can only provide a fraction of what you deserve
Olympians soaring from the coast docking on Clacton’s shores
Travelling from miles on end just to get a glimpse
Of that smile on your lips

You’ll Never Know

You don’t have to tell me it’s wrong
Tell me you won’t reciprocate
I know how a confession would go
So you’d be damn sure that you’ll never know

But I know everything about you
I know about all the things you do
I can do all the things they joke about doing
No doubt that’d I do them all

Oh baby I know it’s wrong
After years of work on the reconstruction
Of our minds after the jeckels have been at them
To look at you with these kind of eyes
But when that your body glistens in the light
And when you bite them lips so tight
All I can think of is the mountains of ways
That I’d blow your mind

You don’t have to tell me it’s wrong
Tell me you won’t reciprocate
There’s only one way it could ever go
And of course you’ll never know

But I know everything about you
I know about all the things you do
I can do all the things they joke about doing
Baby I’m all yours to control

Please open your eyes man
I can see the strings she pulls from over here
It’s supposed to be enforced by dates in the park
Not fondles by the opponents after dark
Oh what I wouldn’t give to take you away
From them forcing you onto the main stage
But darling I know it’s far to late
That there’s far to much at stake

Oh I know everything about you
Like the back of my hand
There’s nothing I won’t do
For a little taster of you

But I know everything about you
I know about all the things you do
I can do all the things they joke about doing
And I’ll show no signs of stopping at all

Baby please don’t tell me it’s wrong
Beacuse everything’s all wrong
Darling please you got to know!
Darling please I need you!

If I was born a girl
I’d stow you away
If I was born a girl
I’d treat you right
If I was born a girl
If only…

Summer x2

Now I’m willing to accept the idea
Of viewing skin cells and eyelashes
From a 100,000 x zoom in would deter some
But it’s a hell of a view for me
And there’s nothing I’d rather see
While laying on this turf
Under the watchful eye of the summer sun
As we lay you ask me if you wanna
Travel the scene for some sugary treats
I’ll be honest love, if I ate one little bit
My stomach would explode from the nerves
Lets just lay here a little longer
Besides there’s only one thing I can think off
That I’d want to have a taste of right now
So let me get a better view of them eyes
And lets just….
Yeah lets just…

A STRANGE BREED (W.I.P)

It’s a work in progress, may tart it up later on if inspiration allows it

Oh no honey your mistaken
It’s not that i’m executing a strategy
That’s all graced their ears before
It’s that i’ve allready become this excited
About the prospecting of you
Becoming a factor in my life, at the least

I’ve never felt this happy in a long time
Oh darn I should’ve bit my tounge

I’ve become a victim once again
Of the Stanford marshmallow experiment
I know if i waited untill saturday night to kiss you
I would’ve gotten many more in return
But honey when you’ve been offered the whole cake
I couldn’t just pick of the iceing
and leave it at that

I’ll spend an evening immortalizing you into verse
But it’s getting past 3 and i’m still on your eyes
Oh crap I should’ve kept my trap closed

I don’t know what they could possibly expect from me?
My track record is a complete joke
They should know if they put the pistol in my hands
I can’t help but close my eyes, aim, and go all out
I’d love to put on the theatrical mask
and role play it so cool with you
But i’ve been labeled with fautly genetic you see?
I can’t help but be completely honest with you

I’ll let you into secrets only a therapist should know
Oh fuck I need to keep my mouth shut

I never wanted to scare you away,
But I guess i’m just a freak like that