If Kisses Mattered

My friend, we may of been allies for passing upon passing of the sun
But you shouldn’t dare shoot me a look like that in front of the cheese scones
While I unveil another tale of a romantic exploit crashing into the bushes
The way you tell me to stop pushing for 200mph on the first lap
It takes me back to an era long lost where kisses weren’t just a method
To escalate to sensual liberation but actually meant a damn all on their own

So I decide to try and spread it like the last of the butter
That’s trying to cater to a breakfast meant for 4
It may last for longer but it don’t taste nearly as sweet anymore
And that’s not even accounting the distortion in the mirrors image
The plates of my skin start to crack from my fingers like bark
Little quirks in my speech became foghorns, coughs became gunshots
When you started at me from the edge of your bed, and turned away
A ravine of sludge leaking from openings must’ve been all you could see
It’s only way my mind could make sense of things
As each passing day went us by, that we went untouched

And now I’m left here like a chorus with no subtext
I just want you to open my pores and give me context
I could be risking another wreckage for sure
But to risk censoring myself is a fate far worse
I want to lock our psyches by the pinky fingers
So while our keisters share a plot of cobble stone
Outside of a treasure map destination
I bleat a plea in a soft frequency into your ears

“Oh lady it’s just lately I’ve been feelin’ real ugly
So hook me by the folds of my skin and embrace me”

There’s Majesty In The Art Of Doing Nothing

Gorging on the flavours of a grass reed
The tip of my hat blinding of the worlds evils
Like shirtless apes poking a ball around
While sniffing the skirts of innocent passers-by
And low end music students butcher Skinny Love
In the hopes of finding validation in their life choices
While the ladies parade the cobble catwalk
With shoestring outfits on a shoestring budget

I live for them milliseconds chances
Where the ends of our arm hairs collide
If just for a fraction, while we try and get comfortable
It’s the perfect catalyst for the event
Where the gravity between us grows more intense
A mysterious phenomenon that we can’t explain
I better hold onto your hand dear
Before you float away from us, into the stars unknown

Conversations flow like butter
Our limbs tangle like taffy
Subjects slide away like grease
Smiles behind fringes like sugar
Top it off with caricature descriptions
Slathered head to toe with syrup

Barraged by thoughts of tracing fridge magnet drawings on your side
Whilst you stand just outside of my bedroom window
Your silhouette contrasting with the collapse of the day time
Like a monument erected behind a cathedral stain window
Trying to keep away from miles away, my current Everest
There’s nothing I can do, I have to abandon my cool, and gush to you

With my limbs and tongue infused with velocity
I offer refuge from the English weathers tantrum
We could widdle away the hours trying to find the moles on our arms
Playing thumb wars, I spy and analyse the dye in our eyes
Because if you ask me there’s an art in wasting time
With the most immaculate company a boy could hope to find

~Dedicated To Esme~

Overwrite

What a terrifying age we must live in
If your confessions of violations
Doesn’t cause the brow to lift anymore
But instead causes a pre-planned sonnet
Pulled from a recollection of a past romance
I guess it’s just that common these days

You park yourself on the side of my bed
While you indulge in a silent war inside your head
No matter how much you try to reason
Your mind can’t stop reenacting those memories
The choker on your throat, And the claws on your thighs
And your need to recollect still shows
You react to collision with other skin cells
Like dynamite would react to a live wire
But it’s no use, you can’t control your body
Your heart screams out like a megaphone
Calling out for any emulation of affection
So you can go back to a simpler time
Where the act of simple carnal desires
Didn’t open the flood gates to a wave of guilt
To wipe the white board clean
To overwrite the association that you carry

You drag me over you like a bedsheet
Your eyes pleading me to set you free
I lay a trail of breadcrumbs from your neck
With my kisses all down the side of your frame
I feel you start to shiver as I approach your navel
You look down me from behind a lens of apprehension
I abandon my quest and approach you from surface level
I cradled your cranium in the palms of my hands
Planted another kiss on the fringe of your head
And remind you I’ve become subservient to your passion
I’ve renounced my will I’m all yours to command
As you take me back in your arms

It drives me to the point of despair
That the world could treat you like this, so early
I know it sounds like a mammoth of a task right now
But there’s no need for you to fear people
For every dragon that parades the plains
Lays a saint ready to avert your gaze

I want to cradle you tight up to my chest
To deflect all the tragedies of the planet
All your dread, contempt and bile
I’ll take it all in a stride like it was just a favour
I want to explore every single cell that gives you life
And make a mark of my devotion
On every single one
Even if after the events of tonight
You choose to cast me aside
To spring board for the gold medal
The one your golden heart really deserves
I’ll still spend every kilojoule in my blood
To wipe the slate clean
To replace feelings of terror, with hunger
To anticipate his touch on your back
To bring life to your cheeks
To make you feel like those villains
Where just a stone in your shoe

Acting Domineering With The Clubbers Of Colchester

Why’d you have to shriek at me so fucking loud?
I’m trying my hardest to juice a bit of joy from this car wreck
But in the midst of this murder of scavengers
The type that pick apart the scraps of poor lost lambs
Caked in petrol station cologne, it’s a sickening sight
You slump in your seat as if inviting me to do the same
I was born with more class then that love
And besides what exactly have you done to sell me on the act?

All you’ve done is make your disappointment in my boredom known
If I had a penny for everytime I came under criticism
Cos’ I refused to fall in line for the male stereotype
I’d of brought you a taxi home, just to get you out of my face

You shell out a drug lords daily paycheck
To sit your arses in the in the side of the club
Snapping evidence of having a good night out
To justify your empty wallet the next day
But oh my god I’m falling asleep
I left my mothers womb 21 years ago to have fun
So why is it such a trail to get you on the dancefloor
Lets put them litres of booze in us to good use!

Oh please let me free!
I can’t stand to put up with this anymore
There’s more to life then drinking and making evidence for it
Get a hobby, get a life, get a fucking clue
I wish you weren’t such a disappointment
I wish you didn’t make me so mad
I wish you’d just let me be myself, instead of a ‘man’
Maybe it’ll be better if you just fucked off?

Created as a counterpart to this poem:
http://thetartanprelude.tumblr.com/post/84960870662/acting-submissive-with-the-clubbers-of-colchester

If Only I Could Overcome The Social Stigma and Ask If You’re Okay

What a sight for sore eyes, right smack in the middle of a birthday due
It’s been an Autumn and a Winter, since I caught wind of your silhouette last
A lanky young marsupial perched over in the corner of the bar
Leaking from the ears in dark ale from the latest special offer
Entertaining two mysterious characterise you might of called darling
Desperately scrambling in your pockets for the antidote
That might keep this conversation from dying
With very minimal success

The blood in your veins runs thinner, to make room for the booze
You could tell by the 3rd glass of JD that slipped through your fingers
And found it’s way in segments onto the dancefloor
You dodge the bouncers gaze like it was choreographed
Demand in slurred tongue they play Last Nite again
You shoot a look my way every now and then
I can see you visibly wince when you saw me in his arms
And soon after you disappeared out the door

Then it hit me like a ton of history revision books
Tomorrow was a dire date indeed to remember
It was when your beloved Empress departed from our planet
Suddenly all your movements became see through
Something, anything to wake up to on that horrible morning
To clutch you in their arms, to kiss you on the head
To tell you it’s all going to be allright
To offer you a tour of the arcades to take your mind of things

You were last seen slouched against the wall of V-Bar
Wiping your tears away with an empty bottle of Desperado
You moved your head like a periscope as if waiting for something
Checking your phone as every second passed as if your life depended on it
And with the way your cover up your arms
And the way you rubbed the inside of your legs
And how you massaged that scar on your throat
Who knows? Maybe it really did

Did I do this to you?
If I stuck around after you unlocked the cuffs
Could I stopped you getting this way?
I wonder as I find my way back to my home

Do You Hate Me?

That look of worry when you opens your eyes
See? She hates you
When you get out of my bed like a robot
See? She hates you
How you shrug my hand from your shoulder
See? She hates you
The way you hold that silent note
See? She hates you
That way you carry yourself down the stairs
See? She hates you
When you show my lips your cheek
See? She hates you
When you don’t say you’ll see me again
See? She hates you
And I’m just left waving to the door
See? She hates you

It never hurts as much as it does then
When you know they’re glad to be out of your door
Your love notes became a lot more dry since then
Devoid of letters or a personal touch
Using an efficient lack of words as you could
All to give the doggy his bone, not cos you wanted too
No explanation, no warning of what I did
I just wanted to hold you through out the week
All I ever did was try to make you feel my affection
But no she hates you

That’s just the way the dating game goes
She’ll come to hate you
Atoms clash at an alarming rate
She’ll come to hate you
We’ll share memories in the taxi
She’ll come to hate you
You’ll drain me of sensual ecstasy
She’ll come to hate you
But they always grow to hate you
She already hates you

The New Life (Epilogue)

I’m starting to grow hungry
After a barrage of sleepless nights revaluating again and again
Each and every way I could’ve lived a previous life better

Oh but what use is that now?
I’ve already collected sacks of golden nuggets
Picked fresh from greenest of grasses from the otherest of sides

I’m not afraid no more
Of the long walks home after a failed start an unheard cry
It’s just a hour in a night in pursuit of lifetime indulgences

Different sparks to feel
Going up your spine when she grabs your arms under the streetlights
A detonates a new embrace to clear the air of clouded minds

Oh it’s no concern of mine
I’m ready to take your hand and jump the fence to the other side
Ready to embrace the new life

A Continuation of “The New Life”
http://thetartanprelude.tumblr.com/post/82312249965/the-new-life

*Written For National Poetry Month – 30/30*

Just Four Words

I feel like anything I’ve claimed to have cherished
Is slowly sieving through my fingers like sand
Their’s no place to call my home
Their’s no person to call my own
Laying on a loaned mattress in a loaned domain
I feel like the batteries aren’t included now more then ever
I have no idea what was going through my mind
When I picked up the only thing keeping our door ajar
And against any intelligent thinking
Send you a message of just four words

Just four little words to let you know
You still come into my thoughts every now and then

What a massage to a broken ego our time was
In the company of those who would call me worthless
You let me know my words captivated your heart
In the company of those who would call me incapable
You made me feel like I could be a real man
In the company of those who would call me detestable
You grabbed me from the public eye so I could be all yours
Just four words to tell you how much that meant to me

Just four little words to let you know
How much I could use your company right now

When you get my little fortune in your cookie
What exactly will happen?
Will you drop the ban you’ve placed on yourself
And get the first method of transport to my house
Knock on the door exactly three times
And lay your arms around me in an embrace
Tell me you never meant anything by it
And that you want to make up for lost time

But probably not
And the guarantee we’ll never cross paths ever again
Will only grow stronger like a gaping chasm
Now I’ve sent you those four little words

Just four little words to let you know
I’m still thinking about you
Just four little words
I really miss you

*Written For National Poetry Month – 27/30*

Poor Daisy

I wish I could say it straight to you
Why I feel like I have to get behind the curtains
And then disappear in a splash of doves in front of your eyes
Why I bring attention to the flaws in my psyche
Only to keep the explanations under a timed unlock
Why I ripped out my hair, over the buzzwords in your greetings
Before acting like nothing had happened to following day
And I dismiss all the above with “You haven’t caught me on a good day”

But it matters not how much of a heart a gold Daisy has
A human can only tolerate so many questions thrown their way
Especially if someone’s ripped all the answers out from the back
Daisy stops making the effort to come and see me
Daisy stops telling me that she thinks the world of me
Daisy stops wanting me to hold her hand in the street
Daisy starts to detonate the dynamite whenever she can
Make the very earth around us shatter and sink into the ground
Puts me at the very forefront of domestic carnage itself
Daisy smashed my nose, Daisy smashed my copy Pokemon
Daisy slashed the ropes that kept this bridge hanging, Daisy slashed herself
All in thin hope she could goat me into something resembling a reaction
But as much as I rummaged in my pockets for a spare one, I couldn’t provide
All I could fine was a spare 3.50 in coppers and nuggets
Perfect to walk out the door and leave her self-destructing
In the pursuit for one more gin and tonic and maybe a pint of pale ale
And maybe if I keep pumping it into my body and rummage around my head
I could find something resembling an emotion, But I couldn’t find one

*Written For National Poetry Month – 26/30*

Tsundere

Ecch, Blacch, Accck
Just some of the noises the on lookers make
When they see me follow your lead, mere seconds
After an onslaught of demoralisation
My appearance and my character come under fire
But I don’t expect people
Who just lick the sugar of a doughnut
To understand how good the jam inside is
Cos I know like a kitty batting a new toy
Each and every lash from the tongue
Is the only way you can show your affection
Call me delusional, but I know this for sure
Cos just like a yo-yo the further I move away
More you come back to me in spades

I can’t imagine you’d believe a single word of the accounts
From the pages of my personal histroia
You like to make it out as if I’m a lost traveller in desert
Oh I wouldn’t say that I’m not dying of thirst right now
As we lie in on a weeknight, knowing an oasis on sensual liberation
Is just a fingertip away, oh god I’m such a whore right?

And yet your face seems to crash down a few floors
When you spot the tales of the ones preceded you
Hey it’s that girl you always spot around the club
The one you always used to visualize next to the mirror
Yeah, you better believe we did
Then suddenly your grip on my arm gets tighter
And you now you say I’m just a doofus instead a prick
As shallow as it gets, but I guess girls will be girls

Oh but darling all this it could be yours
All you have to do is leave the armour at the barracks
And hand me a joystick, and un-pause the adventure
If just for a night

*Written For National Poetry Month – 25/30*