Hell (W.I.P)

I can’t recall how many times i’ve seen the lunar display
Enhanced by the sheen of the beer goggles
Since I had to unlock the handcuffs on your wrist
The notion of a month passing makes the mind boggle

The hands of the analog
Are making they’re second whip around for the day
The bunions of our feet can take the strain no more
We stagger to the nearest bench to lay

I know there are better ideas then issuing a response
To your little Morse code tappings up and down my legs
Like juggling TNT’s at a pyrotechnic festival blindfolded
But lagging hearts can only think in the short term

I’ll endure your intent even while I bleed
Anything to stop the dreams
What was a suggestion has become a plea
What was a want is now a need

Oh I’m in hell
Trying to crack a smile
Oh I’m in hell
Pulling the smoke over my lies
Oh I’m in hell
Trying to enjoy it all the while
Oh I’m in hell
Stuck inbetween these two thighs

Poison

All I ever wanted to do was shower them with prizes
To latch onto as they travel through the darkest days
The kind they’d open up a jewelry box to their grand kids
And tell them exaggerated tales of the golden years
But as I watch them fall head first into the night, time and time again
As a common denominator you do have to wonder don’t you?

I’m the doubt in their voice
I’m the pause before the retreat
I’m poison
I’m the doubt in their abilities
I’m the sigh in the night
I’m poison

All I ever wanted was to see my girls sore into the night
With or without me by their side, eyes dilated with glee
Whatever the method may be, no matter the price
Because If I have to see another one fall from grace
I may just put the next bullet in my brain instead
I don’t want to do it to them anymore, not again

I’m the lack of scale in their thoughts
I’m the bar that’s been set low
I’m poison
I’m the cracks in the mirror
I’m the 2 for 1 concealer
I’m poison

Take It In Your Stride

A simple request I’m sure for a pair of young lovers
But I wouldn’t dare articulate the tar that ruins my face
I can sympathize with your perspective darling
It’s a horrible sight to see your lover writhe in the night
But a young loner can’t open the gates to hell
To an audience who are staring at their own reflection

I understand that your first world is ending
The milks gone bad and the dog won’t stop barking
So let me run upstairs and lock the door tight
Grab the utensils and take it all in my stride

Not even a month in and I’m sure you want answers?
Why during the perfect picturesque winter dates
I choose to drop all the smiles and head on home
Oh darling I’d love to drop all my defences and let it go
The way memories slip from my mind like loose change on the floor
The way my emotions ricochet of every word you say
The way I’ve lost the colours from my world, that I may of never had
But I know you’d ignore every word I say, when your phone’s on the fritz

I understand that your first world is ending
Your dad’s making you walk the mutt again
So let me run upstairs and lock the door tight
Grab the utensils and take it all in my stride

Oh it’s a two way street
Knowledge given
Needs a ear to receive
I know where your priorities lie
And they aren’t with me, not yet
I’ve done damn fine keeping things
All to myself
Don’t get upset when
I decide to tighten the lips
You’ve got to earn these truths
If you can’t work for it
I can’t put up with it

I understand that your first world is ending
Jenny called you fat again
So let me run upstairs and lock the door tight
Grab the utensils and take it all in my stride

Someone’s Aunties 30th

It all starts with a question, asked so innocently enough
It’s hard to be honest, ‘We’re doing fine I guess’
A family ocasion, as if to postpone my lifetime
But it doesn’t work, it makes it worse

Another meal for 50 for 15, on a summers after
From the old stories, to the awkward catch ups
Nods for the outsiders, Hugs to those in the loop
Don’t worry about it, I’m doing fine

It all kicks off with a story, ‘Was she, Is she, Does she?’
All to keen to voice a view, Gathered like jackels
She’s quiet in the corner, nestling her Bacardi coke
I didn’t come to see a mauling, it makes it worse

After a meal for 50 for 15, on a summers eve
From the recycled jokes, to the awkward goodbyes
Nods for the outsiders, Hugs for those in the loop
Don’t ask me again, I sware I’m fine

Overstaying my exit to understate the moment
Drunken ideals and sobering jokes, A new boyfriend and a old flame
More cake then conman sense
A witch-hunt for the wounds, That solidifies the myths
All I can do is mull into myself, all I can think about is myself
I’m stuck thinking of myself, I’m stuck with myself
While i’m stuck in this frame that never ends
I can’t take it anymore, Not anymore!

Oh it starts with a feeling! From the pit of my gut!
You want me to be honest? I just want to fucking die!
I already know what you want to ask, what you want to hear
I just wanna, go home

But no I’m stuck here, in the dead of night
Holding back the flood, with selected brands of sugar
The distraction of charades, can only last so long
Of course i’m not fine, lets go

Oh it starts with the alarm, in the next morning
I can’t live this way any longer…

We ain’t nothin’ about nothin’

A buzz to click you back into conciseness
The bigwig is calling for your appearance
A bead of sweat travels down the skull
You reluctantly agree to be grilled for the day

You rearrange the paper cooler cups by size
To postpone the transaction of self esteem
He heaves his heavy body up from the chair
And starts to head to the throne room

He gives it his best, and it still wasn’t up to spec
When has it ever been too their spec?
The spec is a speck to you now

You’re a zero, nothing more than a zero
You were born from zero and their you stayed
And if you forget they’ll be too quick to remind you

A bus ride back to the lady’s apartment
Lagging by an hour, with the stench off commoner
You knew from the start this visit was business
She gotten sick of your face, and your excuses for being late

Greeted by her screams of fictitious events
What can you say? When words seem useless
A sigh of disappoint will have to suffice
The love as gone back to that familiar zero

He gives it his best, and it still wasn’t up to spec
When has it ever been too her spec?
The spec is a speck to you now

You’re a zero, nothing more than a zero
You were born from zero and their you stayed
And if you forget she’ll be too quick to remind you

Walking back carrying months of your life on your back
Rainy night, the sky just oozes with delight
When all seems lost to you now, a pleasant sight
Your mate stuck in the gutter with a bottle of gin in one hand

Patrolling about the town, as he leads you to the heard
Telling the exaggerating tales of a Wednesday evening
A pat on the back, a charity shot of vodka
And suddenly the comfort zone has returned, he says:

‘I gave it my best, and it still wasn’t up to spec
When has it ever been too the spec?
The spec is a speck to me now

But now my best goes into these friends of mine
And the results are a guarantee’

But we’re all zeros here and nothing more
We was all born from zero and their we shall remain
We don’t need reminding we’re all in the same boat

What better way to spend a Wednesday evening?