So Ugly (I Am) [W.I.P]

It’s okay to feel secure right?
To enjoy all the confectionery of your romance
To rest on the foundations we’ve made together
There’s no chance of being usurped
BUT FROM THE LEFT! ZWAP! POW! SWISH!
HOLY FUCK!
You never see it coming a blow to the body
A strike to your face, and sneer from the shadows
And suddenly it all comes raining down
Someone’s stolen your love, no it’s even worse
You never had a love to lose in the first place
It can’t be I couldn’t of lost it all
Not to a kilobyte of spectlyte, anti socialite, vomit inducing, gargoylyte

But you’ll find that the biggest victories
Come from the unlikeliest of places!

YOU! Oh get a load of you, your entire being optimizes
All those autistic mannerism, aspects, stereotypes
I de-fragmented out of my systems!
You, the collection of things I hate about myself
You used them against me, left me swaying to and fro
You’re the MVP, you’ve taken the jackpot home
You can’t of won you version 1.0 digitalyte
A post patch pansy, boretisitc snorzamel

But you’ll find that the biggest victories
Come from the unlikeliest of places!

A bleeding sandbag, a colourful corpse
That’s the state you left me this Monday morning
Dragging my tails from the London bridge
On a one way ticket, on my carriage heading up Nowrich
He got me good that fuckwading shit stained kitted jumper toting dweeb
That predictable app-uling swallowing, belenginiring dork
That limp amateur hour, hormone deprived, second class Jiggalo
That one note, deaf tone, flatline to everyone’s summer jam
That crocodile smiling, reptilian skinned, asphalt of a man
That stuAAARRGGHHH I CAN’T FUCKING TAKE IT!

I know that the biggest victories in history
Come from the unlikeliest of places!
But if I’m a Blue Ribbion to his Crunchie Bar
Then what am I?
Something so awful it can’t be describe

A deafening silence, that’s what I am
And that’s worse then anything I could call anyone
That’s worse then nothing

23 [W.I.P]

An eon or two, on tippy toes~
Trying to be heard across the mass
The place felt pretty desolate before
Now it’s 8 units, 8 flames of life, 8 experiences
With the noise of 50,000 roars
I sware it wasn’t so hard to be heard
But now everyone’s up and gone I’m lost in the heard

Cos they don’t give a shit when your 23
What’s your AK0′s?
Yeah 23′s gotta be the age…
Where the solitary ready to ruin alone

Accomplishments that would result in tribute
End up nothing but a cough during a symphony
But maybe that ain’t so bad
The only critic that matters is your own monologue right?
I spose’ but I miss them misty eye’d looks
To make my near vicinity, a source of invigoration
Ooohh what a feeling, what a bargaining chip!
I didn’t think I’d lose the moment so soon

Cos they don’t give a shit once you hit 23
What’s gonna be on your tombstone old man?
Yeah 23′s the age, for sure
From cocoon to moth, you

metamorphosize.on your own

The Power Of Youth [W.I.P]

Make sure to soak every second of this in
Swipe away the condescending stares and slurs
The ones flung by the powerless low set girls
The attack of your candour behind SMITE accounts

Because your the monarchy right here and now
And the parliament, as well as the rebels and movers
In the arms of your sidekick, in the comfort of his seat
As the subjects grasp for tributes and activities
All to feel for one second they were on your level
Soak it in young’un this’ll be the only time it’s in reach
The only time a flick of the wrist, results in a new glass
Each curve of the spine, encouraging the spit reserve

The aged might tear into the bobbing of the lap
But were they any different, all them nights ago
They gritt their teeth ever second they’re not in your shoes
To command a committee of admirers
To ascend past a 2nd class citizen
Oh what a treat! What she’d give to return to that……

Safety Net’s A Bitch [W.I.P]

You couldn’t find the time to squeeze us in
Not when it’s 2 hours left until the derby
But you’ll be fine, no need to sigh
Not when old Brain’s waiting by your bed side
So a pat on the head, a kiss on the cheek
And I watch you trot out of the door
I’ll just sit here and document 8 rows
Some good, most allright
Finishing off the last of our spiked lemonade
It keeps the utensils in the drawers for another night

You can’t find the heart to miss the showing tonight
Not when it’s a Netflix season premiere
So it’s due again the next fortnight I spose?
So a pat on the head and a kiss on the cheek
And another round of spiked coke cola
I’ll sit here and document another 8 rows
Each one being worse and worse then the last
Contemplating where my life even went

3/31

It’s Me [W.I.P]

But it’s just a patriot you paint
I can see the tear stains around the signature
Yes you can emulate success
With a dime a dozen vocation you can call progression
Despite another step not being taken for so long
From this view it’s funny, the way you’d berate the before
I saw the tracks of a tasmanian devil
Smashing through anything that got in her way
But you said you’ll be different now
Things have to change, no more selfishness, no more anger
No scorn, No spite, No venom
No happiness, No satisfaction, No fulfilment
It’s amazing to think you can see it that negatively
But it’s no mystery how you got here
You saw me on my way to accession
Whistling a destructive swan song on the way
You can only see the scars despite the climb
So you see, I know it’s all down to me

2/31

He’s Not Always Like This

You’re not the only thing in your orbit anymore
But you’d never catch that with a still life of us
Sullen eyebrows and penny drop silences
Hypnotised spouses and distress signals
I try to break through the atmosphere with choking
Inquires and concerns squeeze through a closed windpipe
But I get the feedback of a crackle in a crash site
We’re joint at the hip, but I’m so alone

I make the same impact entering your vicinity
That a knock knock joke makes at a funeral
The disinterest is making me dip dye into madness
Nothing baits it more then your own thoughts echoing off the wall
I need to start taking chemistry on the side
Cos I don’t know which formula hidden in the air
Turns my cries for help into a defensive reaction from you
Each outstretched arm like a knife in your hide
Each yearn for affection; a threat to your precarious ego
Not when your bacon is smeared on these support beams
The change of oil, scented candles, a premium dota account
Like fuck should I dare take that way from you
So I guess I’ll sit back and take in the atmosphere
We locked ourselves in here, but I’m still so alone

I just really like you
About as much as you’ve become sick of me
I keep liking you more and more
Maybe at the same rate of you become weary of me
We’re on route to be betrothed, but I’m so alone

I miss giving rasberries on your neck
I miss tickling the inside of your palms
I miss neglecting the stars for a full view of you
I really like you, but I’m so alone

Now I have no idea where I am
Leaving a leeches impression on his neck
Leaving a tally with my nails on the toilet cubical
I feel weird
My skin feels like it’s peeling off my arms
As he runs his fingers down my silhouette
My spit feels foreign, My tears feel like waste
And as I whisper worship to him, he breathes life into me
I don’t know him and he can do it, anyone can
Anyone who isn’t you can breathe life into me
I don’t like him, but now I feel I’m in reality again
I feel so weird

I can’t stand missing you, when I see you everyday
I reek of substance and perspiration
But it’s still not enough to raise an octave out of you
A nod, a twitch if I’m lucky, and then back to null
I feel super weird, I feel like I wanna die
I take his 50 and your old parka
I take anything I call my own into a bag
I dodge tear stains and haste together a cliff note
“Fuck you
Anyone could do it and you choose not too
Just fuck you!”
I jump into his car and make a dive out of your field
You’re the only thing in your orbit now
But did you even notice anything different
Can anyone else do it too?
Now I’m across the toll booth
I feel so fucking weird
Now I’m really alone
And now I don’t know what I feel…

October Poetry Month 1/31

Know oneself, Know Nothing else [W.I.P]

Plump, full and pristine
They make the act fulfilment look easy
Success stories plastered all over the tag
But like a Polaroid sex selife
That’s a lot of effort put into looking effortless
“I’m like this all the time” through crocodile teeth
Thanks for the vote of self-consciousness
Cos surely, oh surely it isn’t just me
Screaming for affection, echoing back retaliation
Looking at success and content, like a Roswell autopsy
I recognize elements for sure, but they’re so far from me

Surely I’m not the only one beating their heart against a wall
Drawing dust from the monument of the lovers call
It wouldn’t be so bad if I was packing with ignorance
We’re all twiddling our clits and dicks on a conveyor belt
Picking our social barraging chips from the shelves
A pinch of E for you, a doctors prescription for me
What I mean to say is I never wanted the barrier to increase
For the quota to get even more precise then before
But you’d think I’d just struck the gold mine
Ticket tape parades on the park benches
Congrats! Now you know a lot more about yourself!
But now I know less about my world then with my eyes shut

Now, I don’t mean to be cynical but this doesn’t feel better…

I can’t repeal the ideal outcome from my mind
A single bedroom pad, with resources seconds away
Come barging back from another book signing
The Queen and The Goddess both turn in tandem
Grasping salvation in my hands; a family meal deal
And after they both pin me down, teeth gritting, demands in hand
Complying line by line, like a good slave oughta
There’s no doubt in the efficiency the format provides
As we’re recovering our vitality arms in arms
To white trash youtube until the break of dawn
But in a world of keyword comms, what’s of point of it?
1,000 pets and funnymen won’t posses the quota of wit

Cos surely, oh surely it can’t just be me?
That’s had every dream and idea, slowly taken away?

Depressed Again (Thankfully) [Scribbles]

She kept on beat with the pen on her board
She takes one look and decrees “We need to make this stop”
Do you mean return to the persona of lost youth
A little lost flicker in the wind starry eyed an gleaming
With no capabilities then to express the twee between the trees
Met with all the welcome and warmth of a death row inmate

We’d never admit it but the world can’t accept that purity
In the vicious waters of stasis we can’t relate to immaturity
Like an intruder in our home we reject it’s presence
Restrain it against the chair and make it experience penance

The world wears a smile and stay happy attitude
But nothing could be farther from the truth
They want to see you on the edge
They want to see you relatable
I’ve never felt more accepted
Then when I’ve felt the least healthy here…

Away

Shifting gears for pinker skies
The kind of sold on the front of seaside postcards
Each one of my friends a Hephaestus in their craft
Each lover a Kikuri-Hime of their circles
Maybe if I could bend reality to my whims
A tangle taffy version of my arms could reach the port
Drag myself along the ocean
And tag along the festivities as the observer
The ticker tape apocalypse
An absolutely brutal assault on the eyes
Courtesy of a lexicon of primary spin off’s
A fuchsia, goldenrod on the back of a cinnabar sapphire

I could fake it you know, I could invent the craft
A world renowned speugerlist at JUST 23?
I’d blend in as a icon in a shit stain
The ones to make this an origin to be proud of
No one would have to know otherwise
They can’t hear my cliff note records
Vs. Your encyclopaedia volumes across monthly installs
When faced with the riddle; “What you been up too?”
They don’t have to see me wait in silence
As blood brothers recount the resumes of quests
Grit teethed in the thick of the crowd
Pleasantness with those who could adore
“I wrote something this week but… It’s not your thing”
“I know you couldn’t come, it’s allright”

To them it’s like a gap in persona’s never occurred
We’re all still arm in arm cheering on for the next day’s barrage
Planning escapes and anticipating breakouts
To them, that’s still how it is
No one will have to know the wiser
Please just cast of while I’m putting on my shoes
Oh can’t you find it in yourself to stay?
But I know none of us win, if you don’t go away

– Lnc0

Phsychy Crush

You don’t deny it do you?
You’ve seen the cream cooler constellation come into unison
They correlate into the sun’s 5th unison with Jupiter
Well, that’s the hogwash I’ll use as an excuse to declare
It’s time our orbits collided again

Strawberry fingers, button noses
Outside the local polka performance
Tootsie tickles, Coca bottle catapults
Leaving a culinary trail in our wake
Like the application of a mask
And the equip of a personal
We settle for a motivation
A colouring in outside of the script
The fun, The murk, The gull
I’ll make any excuse to see you again

– Lnc0