“Nice jacket”
As another hometown special flies down the gullet
Dictated by the throw of the die or the deal of the hand
I told ‘em “I need release, from the ails of the week”
“Ales you say!” as my glass is miraculously refilled
A few “I learned this from Leeds” cocktails get rationed out
As more of my best brothers and sisters add to the roster
“Hey I really like your jacket”
We ride the hearse into the roosters den
I feel like an Infant as I take my first steps on the pavement

What a life this is; objectively

We kick down the portcullis into the snake pit
“Dude that’s a sweet jacket”
As we screech an echo as “Can’t stand me now” hits the deck
Like the traveling karaoke no one asked for
We migrate to the garden of Eden
“Gotta say, you really suit that jacket”
Recounting the weeks fables like fisherman’s tales
I say “I tell you again I need some release
Feels like a canines life time I’ve been on the phone
Juggling referrals and appointments like they’re my kids
I don’t really know what that means, but I need to unwind”
As my moan comes to a close I swear I saw my future skirt by
We spoke standing on the pillars of artistic expression
I said “Your right no one talks about ideas anymore”
She said something about my jacket
Just as the chains on our hearts grew tighter and tighter
Lightning must’ve struck, cos in a flash she’s gone
Did anyone see where she went!?
Shitting fuck son of a twatting cunt!
Oh well, only takes a Kraken and coke later
And we’re screeching indie anthems again
“You gotta tell me, where’d you get that jacket?”

What a life this is; objectively

Better then what’s to come next
As we enter that foulest domain
Where decaying dregs cling onto their youth
By crying out 90’s throwaways
The kind you’d be embarrassed to tell your kids you remembered
At least another apple of my eye’s come into view
And she’s fawning for my attention
But in the most serial killer way
As her friend jostles my shoulders
Pushing me her way, as she turns her head
Flag’s raise until a sea of rouge covers the dance floor
She stays away, but continues to stare
I was never a man to cave to peer pressure
Never one to play the “Hard to get game”
Was I expected to? Just cos I’m a man?
And that’s what the sliver screen says we should do?
I’m a diamond in a Pog collection
If you want a part of me, you gotta reach out and get it
Am I not entitled to feel like a prize too?
Right now I feel like a Minotaur in a zoo
I take my brothers and sisters and vacate
I’m a glorious human before biology

What a life this is; objectively

We end on the soil, where all life began
And compare notes on this weeks crawl
Things can be shit indeed
But your putting the world to rights
Underneath the glistening sky
Y’know things really are allright?
And they’re right; This is a NICE jacket
So that’s allright

What a life this is; objectively

Lnc0

A part of the “4 Nights Of Hell” series