Nothing triggers the Ifrit inside
Quite like a generous slice of the lad pie
Trading sniggers and glances
Over your carefully constructed apparel
“Hey I spend hours on this jacket”
Counterstriking busy hands
One left with a broken finger, a black eye
The steams literally coming of your back

You come out back to cool down
That’s the excuse you tote out anyways
You can tell I haven’t had the greatest time
It’s not their fault in the slightest
Just not a lot a non-member can contribute
I know you wouldn’t let that fly for a second
You come in for the crane method
And perfect the constricting sensation
You secure a fire escape out of the joint
That’s so thoughtful of you, because girls like you don’t exist

I can’t vacate in quite this instance
I have to let the old mast know I’m on my way out
In fact he already senses it as he comes swooping in
There was no reason for him to make an appearance tonight
Or in fact any night, save for one common thread
Does he wait for my ballot before he makes his choice?
Judging by our immaculate way we put the world to rights
I wouldn’t blame him, we’d sell tickets if we could

And at the sight of a ping on his device
A bulletin of another overseas produce
With an unpronounceable name is coming to our shores
They must’ve thought someone malicious
Let of firecrackers down your rear end
The way you jack hammered out at smokers
Then go frigid once you remembered your public location
That’s so adorable you, because boys like you don’t exist