Gross To Me

Is it cynicism? Is it jealousy? I dunno
But happiness just seems gross to me
Like eczema on the back of your leg
The person inside of me, needs tending
Always poping up on the places of my body
When I’m making my way through existing
There’s nothing wrong with that devotion
A singular narrative with two combined lovers
But I think of it like a three-legged race
Like it or not, somethings gotta give

Where ever you roam, breaking out on your dome
They’re there with a smile and a comment
Does it really have to be this way
Does it have to be so symbiote?
Like a wayward bumper car ride
Can’t love bloom through collision?
Guests in each others home
Visitors on the path
I want you to be forever by my side
But if you were to appear in front of me
Or lagged on behind me
I just have no idea of what I’d do

To greet the next coming day
Hand in hand, always connected
But without doubt, we’re in our own universes
But our proximity is what defines us
Defines us as lovers, as soulmates
You intrude when I need you
You book the day off when I need my own time
All with the chains, staying firmly in our heads

Can such a love not bloom?
In a chasm of uncertainty?

Lnc0

The Gaze

We always fall prey for the routine every time
While we’re still imprisoned under the gaze
This is no time for honestly or vulnerability
It’s time to re-pose the action figure
Arms behind your head, back arched
Not a glimpse of even a fraction
Of the crippling pain that washes over you
And makes you cry into your pillow every night

And what about when an innocent bystander
Decides to wander into the cross-hairs
And decides they want to be a part of your fable
How can you disappoint those sweet eyes?
Pull back the curtain and reveal
Your feeling just as much hurt as she is
And what if the gaze catches a glimpse
Of your weakness, of your humanity?
So just keep the power pose on auto
And maybe if we lie hard enough
The fallacy can become the reality

But isn’t that how it went last time?
To me and the owner of the gaze?

Lnc0

I met someone on club tortimer and immediately we hit it off because his status thing said “show me your moves!” and I love captain falcon. I went to his town and eventually we exchanged phone numbers and after that we talked non stop and after months we finally met up because he was only a few states away (we’re both of age) and we’ve been together for 8 months now. and to think it was only his first time on club tortimer a week after buying the game c:

Goals

toddnet:

you know what pisses me off? the entire idea that a drawing is ‘impressive’ if it’s realistic. like if someone who doesn’t really knows much about art sees a kid drawing something realistic they’ll be impressed and tell the kid how talented they are, but if they see them draw something cartoony or stylized [in the same level of skill as they drew the realistic drawing], they’ll just treat it as a doodle

do you have any idea how many years of practicing and studying it takes to draw something cartoony and make it look good? if anything, it takes even more effort than drawing something realistic since you’re deviating from the references you have everywhere [real people] and creating something entirely new [your own style], of which the references you get to study are only other artists’ stylized drawings.

Was going through my old stuff and found some old sketch books from my last job as a Learning Support Provider, sometimes as rare as it is kids actually do behave and get on with their work so…. lot of free time haha I think it’s cute to see what I prioritized like doodling at the time from then to now, like this has a clear emphasis on facial expression, clothes and body sizes, which is weird I think to this day those 3 are the bed rock of my doodles :L

I love all these cuties, and especially since (Spoilers) I’m thinking of trying to do something with my doodles, like maybe a peanuts-y comic or something, it’s great to go back and see all these little ideas I had 🙂