The Fairy Tale

I’m in the wild, I’ve been seen, I’ve been admired
But it’s not enough to patch up this folding heart
Like a leopard behind the glass at the zoo
The eyes pry with no intention of crossing the panes
The smiles, the joy, the inspiration
But still in a solitary context

Boys and girls like avatars of deities
Appearing in forms mortals can hardly believe
Beautiful people as far as the eye can see
It’s enough to make a guy suicide-y

I wanna break the dividers with my bare hands
I wanna ask you every little thing
What things make up you?
What things make you so beautiful?
I want that feeling of being so hooked
Without the reality of the scope of what divides us
Every thought of the day being consumed
I’ll donate a few of the night too
Even if the road leads to a dead end
The way my heart flutters on the way defines
I just want someone to take this energy away
I just want a reason to stay alive

Boys and girls like subjects of mythology
Appearing in ways to shape our destinies
Beautiful people as far as the eye can see
It’s enough to make a guy suicide-y

I know that when night’s cloak covers this town
That’s when dividers break down
And we all revert back to animals
But the angels behind the glass from the daylight
Are nowhere to be seen, returning to the staircase above
Nothing so pure could make it as a creature of the night
We can only ever meet at arms reach away
Never to speak, never to see
If you could deliver to me ecstasy
There’s no hope for me, that definitely makes a guy suicide-y

Lnc0

A part of the ‘4 Nights Of Hell’ series

Dead

Kiss, cradle, sizzle sizzle
I can’t do anything to make you hate me
No achievement can elevate me
No enslavement makes me intimidate
I’ve lost all humanity In the gulf
The only thought that keeps me marching
Is the writhe, the pain, the agony
Taking every inch and transplanting onto you

They come in single file
I have to turn ‘em all away
Your not good enough for my scheme
You’ll hardly graze their arm with that shot
It’s really gotta get underneath their nails
The thought of us has got to cause unfathomable strain
Oh honey of course your the most beautiful thing
But it’s about more then that now

Your remorseless
Unabsolvable by any god or deity
You withdraw into the nest
Free of consequence or reaction
I wanna slip in through the cracks
Tear your bubble open
And consume you
As you see the level I’m operating at
You’ll start to feel regret
You’ll put someone above you for the first time
Just want you to feel that bullet hole
Regardless of weather or not it’s their

I just want you too feel dead
Dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead dead

Dead Like me

Lnc0

A part of the ‘4 Nights Of Hell’ Series

halfdrawnhoopoe:

Julian Casablancas. #juliancasablancas #thestrokes #pencil #sketch #sketchbook #pencildrawing #drawing #art #illustration

While I’m plugging check out my friends art blog, as you can see QUALITY stuff, he’s been out of drawing for some time now and makes me a #happyboi to see him back in his element again, give him so encouragement guys!

Amber Burgoyne

PLUG TIME, a buddy o’ pal of mine Amber has just launched her music page/soundcloud/ ect. ect. I recommend you all give it a try! If you like the content on this blog it’s like the same ballpark so I think you’ll like it 🙂 the R U Mine/Why’d You you only call me…. hybrid is pretty slick

Also if you listen to the live at Best Days gig, you might be able to hear me! MEEEEEE! In the crowd dancing and doing the jeers and such. She says original songs are coming super soon so keep an eye out, or don’t! Cos I’ll post it on here either way

EDIT: Facey-bee page – https://www.facebook.com/amberburgoyne/

Amber Burgoyne

Honestly? This whole writing poetry thing for the last 3 years was building up to that last poem, to really start having a way to articulate to people things I could never really say, that sounds like a cliché but it’s true

I feel like I’m strong enough as a person to break free, like I’m my own person now free from any and all expectations, in fact above is the letter mentioned in the poem, fucking destroyed, no one has that power over me anymore

Dear Mother

Good mummys are supposed to teach their son’s nice things
How to be kind, How to fight against the bullies
But to think about how you taught me to think
Drags like paralysis of the perception
You taught me bruises where kisses
Taught me slurs are disguised love letters
Like when he strolled in and asked “why are you such a freak?
Why aren’t you outside like the normal boys!?”
I cried into your arms, you said you’d have a word
Bet you never did, did you?

He would stroll in from work the next evening
And your title changed to a punching bag
Though you moaned, you obeyed
Because he’d love you through materials and apologies
Yeah bet you proper loved that
Never mind how the spawn interpret that one ey?

Even when you left us the hypocrisy continues
Not content with just life, you deal a blow beyond the grave
On a 2 for 10 from Paperchase you leave me behind
The condescending memoirs of an ashamed parent
You ask I do what I want? Not what I can?
You tell me to break out and be more independent?
Then in the next breath tell me I’m too spastic to do so?
That I can’t get my degree and make it on my own?
“Your condition” “You did well for having your condition”
What the hell’s that supposed to mean?

And your lessons are the cause of it all
It’s those norms I embody during my weakest times
When I let the narcissist do to me what he did to you
Take me apart wire by wire, node by node
And take away everything that was anything inside of me
Install the notion that I’m no better then scum
And put me back together again like brand new
Why question it hey? It’s the only love I’ve ever known

I think of those lessons when I crave the aggression
A connection’s not real if she’s not at my throat
“Do what you can! Not what you want!”
Makes me recall the background soundtrack
To school nights spent cowering in my room
As unwashed dishes crash against the wall
Cos that’s love right? That’s totally normal right?
Letting someone call you an embarrassment?

I think of those lessons at the end of drunken nights
When I keep my mouth shut and let it go
Even after telling her I want to stop
And her legs tighten around me
With no intention of release
And she says “A real man would keep going”
“Without complaining, without consent”
Cos no matter what they do they still love you right?
No matter how deep the cut, it’s out of love right?

Does this sound a little psychotic to you?
To be beaten, trashed and violated
And take it all with a smile and a step?
Well mummy dearest I learnt it all from you!
It’s all your fucking fault
All of it leads back to you
You killed me inside before I even began
I hate you so much, but I’d never let it on
Cos they’ve all made you untouchable
“Poor little saint, taken from us too early”
Not early enough, I’m glad your finally gone
Cos where you are now, you can’t hurt me anymore

It’s gonna take me an age or two
To unlearn all the things you taught me
But I’ll come out the other side better
And I’ll teach myself, to love thyself, for the first time

Lnc0

Allright

No one’s allright are they?
Loving stares into the pine
Hit me with another JD shot
I’m so fucking bored
The kids are all so bored
Get anything inside me
To transmogrify this monotony
Into the start of my next biography

We’re all so frozen
Trapped in the clay that’s made us
But we wall want to feel it
The hooks of kinship
The drug of romance
But we’re just ourselves
So I’ll take another pint
And take my soldiers by the hands
It might not be what we want
But it’s what we asked for
Greeting Monday mornings shift
2 fingers to the sun
2 of our most treasured fingers to the sun

But we’ll be allright
You’re all so beautiful
You’re all the paradigm of youth
The path is long
But it’ll fly past
Especially once you get running
But it’s the wait
Oh god how it’s the wait
So raise your poison
And piss all the time away
We’ll be allright won’t we?
Yeah we’ll be allright

Lnc0

From the ‘4 Nights Of Hell’ series

soapsock:

bearfrickker:

Non-beernary

tl;dr from the article this is about

They use hops where the buds start as male hops buds, and turn female over their lifetime. Proceeds from the sale of this beer are going towards LGBTQA charity.

Google the beer and read the actual article.

My personal saviour Brewdog doing the lords work as per-usal~

I may try and coax my local dive into getting some in, I buy enough Punk Ipa (Also Brewdog) from them to put their kids through college, it’s the least they can do!

What A Life

“Nice jacket”
As another hometown special flies down the gullet
Dictated by the throw of the die or the deal of the hand
I told ‘em “I need release, from the ails of the week”
“Ales you say!” as my glass is miraculously refilled
A few “I learned this from Leeds” cocktails get rationed out
As more of my best brothers and sisters add to the roster
“Hey I really like your jacket”
We ride the hearse into the roosters den
I feel like an Infant as I take my first steps on the pavement

What a life this is; objectively

We kick down the portcullis into the snake pit
“Dude that’s a sweet jacket”
As we screech an echo as “Can’t stand me now” hits the deck
Like the traveling karaoke no one asked for
We migrate to the garden of Eden
“Gotta say, you really suit that jacket”
Recounting the weeks fables like fisherman’s tales
I say “I tell you again I need some release
Feels like a canines life time I’ve been on the phone
Juggling referrals and appointments like they’re my kids
I don’t really know what that means, but I need to unwind”
As my moan comes to a close I swear I saw my future skirt by
We spoke standing on the pillars of artistic expression
I said “Your right no one talks about ideas anymore”
She said something about my jacket
Just as the chains on our hearts grew tighter and tighter
Lightning must’ve struck, cos in a flash she’s gone
Did anyone see where she went!?
Shitting fuck son of a twatting cunt!
Oh well, only takes a Kraken and coke later
And we’re screeching indie anthems again
“You gotta tell me, where’d you get that jacket?”

What a life this is; objectively

Better then what’s to come next
As we enter that foulest domain
Where decaying dregs cling onto their youth
By crying out 90’s throwaways
The kind you’d be embarrassed to tell your kids you remembered
At least another apple of my eye’s come into view
And she’s fawning for my attention
But in the most serial killer way
As her friend jostles my shoulders
Pushing me her way, as she turns her head
Flag’s raise until a sea of rouge covers the dance floor
She stays away, but continues to stare
I was never a man to cave to peer pressure
Never one to play the “Hard to get game”
Was I expected to? Just cos I’m a man?
And that’s what the sliver screen says we should do?
I’m a diamond in a Pog collection
If you want a part of me, you gotta reach out and get it
Am I not entitled to feel like a prize too?
Right now I feel like a Minotaur in a zoo
I take my brothers and sisters and vacate
I’m a glorious human before biology

What a life this is; objectively

We end on the soil, where all life began
And compare notes on this weeks crawl
Things can be shit indeed
But your putting the world to rights
Underneath the glistening sky
Y’know things really are allright?
And they’re right; This is a NICE jacket
So that’s allright

What a life this is; objectively

Lnc0

A part of the “4 Nights Of Hell” series

Another day. another girl saying “You got too interested in that subject, now I’m intimidated and no long find you attractive, bbyyyee”

That happening post-sex is when it really stings