80′s Kids Having Kids

What if you got his pause?
You think it’s just that easy?
Do you think he’d match your deal?
King for king, deck for deck
That he’d even stick around for the 2nd deal
After the audience has been appeased
Once he’s ego’s be re-inflated
“See? Carol saw me do that thing”
Cradling his ceremonial mug
Repeating the same summer park fable
I hope you didn’t put to much on that bet
Cos nothings quite gelling with you tonight

Was ‘love’ quite how you imagined it?
Or was it not as the prophecies foretell
You’ll never be a priority
Not when the real return is in the new blood

What if she sends you birthday cards?
You think it’s just that easy?
Do you think she’d lick your wounds clean?
Close every gash, stitch every cut

Lnc0

CBT Round 2

I dunno, I guess, Maayyybe?
Sorry ma’am, I don’t mean to dodge the question
Should I be honest though?
The more I open, the more turn their backs
I’ve lost troops so vital to a platoon that way
The kind you’d write songs about if they turn slightly right
I mean they’re just words right?
Words are the culprit of the most vicious crimes however

I got fuck all to say
You never know who’s listening
I’ve already lost so many brothers and sisters
How much more skin have I gotta peel away?

But it’d be a waste of a weekly tenner sink
To ignore your advice, I know ma’am
But I take no pleasure biting into Adam’s apple
And to learn shame for my origins
It turns a straight forward bereavement
Into an inferno of malice
And honestly I keep drawing blanks
On what to resent the most of all

I got fuck all to say
You never know who’s listening
I’ve already lost so many brothers and sisters
Haven’t you got more pressing patients to see?

It’d be a one way to the easy life
To keep my mouth shut and blame it on luck
But I know if I keep that up
The knife can only turn on it’s owner
And I know for how much they shake their heads
They know their idol would despair
If my future’s destined to be projected
On a door frame on a particularly cold Wednesday noon

I got fuck all to say
You never know who’s listening
I’ve already lost so many brothers and sisters
What’s so bad on taking it all out on yourself?

It made me sick to even utter the hearsay
The first time for anything’s the hardest they say
Cos god knows I love and miss my mama
It’s never fun to trace the bullets trajectory
Straight to her SMG sniper rifle
Especially after an elaborate cover up operation
But what else I am paying a tenner a week for?
And I’m not uncovering anything not already present

I got so much to say
I know exactly who’s listening
And if I lose everyone, so what?
I deserve genuine affiliation, not an obligation

Lnc0

Terrible As A Dick, Terrible As A Bitch

Gland’s are swollen, hair’s a mess
Eyes like a reptile, that’s if they’re awake
Hearts playing squish against my ribcage
London’s arches have fallen down
As I zip two and fro the town walls
Cos no place stocks my size 12’s
Least not unless I wanna take out a mortgage
Sulking the afternoon over a toffee exlir
Panic spending to justify the return ticket here
Spent the money on a 7" I didn’t even like

It’s tantrum time
Cos I’m tired of being the awkward element
None of my conversations seem to flow
“No it’s about more then the shoes” I said
My friend took to it like a Jehovah leaflet
“But I’m telling you” I said “It’s a sign of my pathway”
Glancing at his watch “Listen man I gotta go”
Maybe it’s something only people like me would know
Those of us who’ve been the caramel on the molar
Feet too buff for kicks, shoulders too broad for threads
Too tichy to be fat, too wide to be skinny
Never been that, won’t ever be this
“I hate to bother you but…” The motto of a life-time

I thought genetics could sneak the hint under the desk
For some semblance of the direction I could go
Yet for every second, a lady will whisper into my ear
“I wish I had your curly hair, your long nails or soft skin
Not to mention the manslaughter I’d commit for them eyelashes”
A story my thighs and hips could collaborate
And with the pay wall being so high
Is it any wonder so many young men cast away that identity
Tell the £75 periwinkles to fuck off
And embrace the 2 for deal on the heeled boots
Too poor to be a guy, but whatever I find out that’s on their head

Lnc0

Echoes

Echoes I wish you were kinder to me
To have some special awareness for the context
And reconfigure yourself on my behalf
To make the wait a little more bearable

Cos even when interceptors pause your return
They’re not much kinder to me
Even when the slots fit the wounds
And we recite our medication from memory
They still refrain from embracing me
Even when the evidence continues to mount
That there’s no one better equipped in this life
For our car wreck existences
Still even when we’re standing here
Crying, vulnerable and dying
They refuse to embrace me
Echoes please tell me why?

Don’t I give them the euphoria they crave?
Don’t I sustain all their needs?
How much more of myself to I have to carve out
Before they embrace me again?
Can you tell me that echoes?
I don’t know how much more waiting I can do

Lnc0